Thank you so much! I am an incest survivor and domestic violence survivor who has been forcibly psychiatrized, coercively medicated, and institutionalized. I live in fear of psychiatry. In a recent mental health crisis following my mother threatening to sue me for writing about the sexual abuse in my family, my (former) best friend threatened to call 911 and have me institutionalized because I was having thoughts of self injury. I was not suicidal. And this (former) friend insists that she was within her rights to subject me to the violence of psychiatry “for my own good.” I know that psychiatry is not for my own good. Thank you for saying this.
That is where the term “hysterical” came from. Abused women were often institutionalize, for being hysterical. Men would abuse them for years, and then get rid of them by institutionalizing them.
Oh absolutely. Just as one example, undiagnosed autistic women (who are often traumatized) are frequently given a BPD or bipolar diagnosis. And these diagnoses leave women vulnerable to even MORE abuse. They’re more likely to believe that they’re the problem. The DSM is not a bible. It gets a lot wrong.
I was diagnosed with BPD even though I barely (and I stress BARELY) fit under any of the symptoms when I was in my first year of college. My college experience itself was traumatic, I was 18, alone with no support system, attending a fundamentalist Christian school. When I came to a counselor about the anxiety and depression I was really struggling with, instead of addressing the trauma responses I was having, I was sent to a psychiatrist and prescribed anti-psychotics… I should never have been prescribed them and was told that they were “mood stabilizers” and any questions I had about the side effects were carefully evaded. Needless to say that I got much worse and had to be removed from school and placed back at home because of a suicide attempt. I have not been comfortable seeing a therapist or counselor since.
I had a VERY similar college experience, including the suicide attempt at age 18 and having to be sent home. I never had a BPD diagnosis, but I had at least two therapists hint at it. I did get a bipolar diagnosis from a psychiatrist and took a mood stabilizer for 20+ years that I thought I absolutely had to take or my life would unravel. Around 6 months ago, I decided to just stop taking it. (I still take my depression and anxiety meds.) I actually feel a little better without it and my mood is completely stable. So was I ever actually bipolar? 🤷♀️Oh, and I was late diagnosed autistic in 2023. 🫠
I've nursed women who have been given this diagnosis, then later discovered they're autistic. It's why I fought so hard (It shouldn't have been a fight, but Autism still isn't recognised in women as it should be) to get my daughter a diagnosis. I was labelled as a bad mother, difficult etc etc all throughout the process of trying to get her referred for assessment.
I’m glad you fought for her. I went through that with my son and it was awful enough. My daughter is homeschooled, and I’ve not had her diagnosed. Should the need arise, I’m not fighting. I’ll only have her assessed by someone I already know will recognize it. That’s what I did for myself, well it just happened, really. I came across a husband and wife couple who worked together and who were diagnosing while also doing research specifically on how autism presents in women. The wife is a psychologist, and the husband a Doctor of Osteopathic medicine. They run an equine therapy center for autistic individuals. The wife is autistic. I knew going in that they knew what they were doing, and that I could trust them. The only person who I would even consider allowing to assess my daughter is herself autistic and has an autistic daughter. But there was no rush for my own diagnosis, and there currently isn’t for my daughter. With my son, we NEEDED that diagnosis. He was in school. He needed accommodations. He was being traumatized in school with the constant punishments for things he literally couldn’t control. And I just started where every parent does. And I went through what you did, and what SO many mothers go through if their child is a girl, or is a boy who doesn’t present exactly as these “professionals” expect. It’s absolute bullshit…so much stress, invalidation, gaslighting, the insinuations and outright accusations that it’s a parenting issue. And it’s the very parents who are already dealing with the most that are treated the worst and have to fight the hardest, when our lives are hard enough supporting our kids on our own, bucking the system, refusing to capitulate, refusing to punish what WE know are behaviors that our kids need love and support and guidance and modeling and understanding and collaboration and empathy for, not shaming and coercing and losing privileges and attacks on their autonomy that only make the behaviors worse, never better. I mean, obviously I could go on and on, lol. I applaud you and every parent of an autistic kid who has to fight for diagnosis because their kid doesn’t fit outdated criteria being applied by inept “professionals” who frankly should just find themselves another line of work as far as I’m concerned.
On a personal level I find this really reassuring and I’m going to download the resource you’ve suggested. It’s left me wondering how to access support that isn’t funnelled through a medical model. When I left an abusive relationship I was asked if I’d been to the doctor, which I didn’t do at the time. But I do need help at the moment, that much I know. Culturally there’s so much credibility attached to the medical establishment, that even though I don’t particularly know if I want to talk to a GP, my trauma almost doesn’t exist if I don’t knock on that door first.
Thank you. This is a very useful perspective. Because of the prevailing narrative I wondered if my depression and anxiety was a mental illness, but since I couldn't afford to see a mental health professional I thought there was no hope for me. Reading about the increasing numbers of people diagnosed with mental health disorders had me thinking that I must be one of the many. More recently, I have realised that I am safe and well now and can choose to move forward, leaving my past in the past and enjoying what might come next.
When my oldest daughter was 12 weeks old, I returned to work. It was a challenge - I was still breastfeeding exclusively, which meant pumping, she still woke up multiple times every night and was difficult to get to sleep at all. My husband was also new to his job and couldn’t take time off, and he wasn’t adjusting well - all the household and baby care work was falling to me. I was angry at him for not stepping up. At one point a nurse asked how I was doing and I expressed some of these challenges and was told I had postpartum depression and needed medication. I ripped that nurse a new one, and told her in no uncertain terms that ANYONE should be upset at these circumstances and that drugging me into accepting them was not going to help. It was the situation that needed to change, not me. Like you said, I felt my concerns were being completely disregarded, as if they were all in my head. She backed off pretty quickly.
Definitely my experience as an incest survivor. And I also hate that I have to "adopt" the medical model and the label at work/with HR to get my employer to accept my absences from work as valid. At my workplace the only valid reasons for absences are childcare, carer's leave or a medical issue with a medical certificate.
This article. Oh, how I wish I knew any of this 20 years ago. But then, who would've listened to me anyway? Unknowingly married to a narcissist, calling him out on his derelictions ultimately saw me crying out for mercy in ways he promised as I said, you and what army? Oh, never, never challenge the charming narcissist if you love your children, value your life. His army, as it turned out, live in those halls of justice we unwittingly run to for help. . Fighting for custody & subjected to those court appointed psych evals. Forced to meet a stranger with some letters behind his name because he was contracted with the state. 30 minutes later, I staggered out of his office slapped with a solid diagnosis Jung himself wouldn't dare conclude in one short, initial meeting. Oh, those magical, all powerful court psychiatrists. How did this soccer mom get there? A phone call from a woman I didn't know brought me the news that my husband had a whole other life outside of the one he shared with our kids and me. As I yelled and sobbed to him, blinded by tears and snot running into my mouth, "What have you done? What have you done? What Have You done to our babies?" He looked... bored? He looked, Impatient, Annoyed.
I slapped his face!
He had me arrested.
And just like that, I was "violent." "Hysterical," "out of control."
I needed psychiatric intervention. Meds. Bipolar! Were the kids safe with me? 20 years later... well, put it this way, you know how they couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again? Yeah. I get it.
I can agree with you Dr.Taylor,but what can you do if you don't represent an entirety of truth,I don't know how things are globally,but the conditions that women are found in after these types of event would typically lead from police to Psychiatrist to medication in Britain,they consider this to be the correct route and the most humane,sensitive one in the face of emergency;I know that this action means that you are placed on medication which removes your capacity to tell the whole truth,they can believe they are stopping someone from committing suicide which can be their response to criticism of people involved in their profession.If you have these experiences it feels like you are removed from a life that you think you understand into an experience that leads you to believe that you no longer know what's going on,which is perceived by others as a removal from reality by people who don't understand that they would behave like this or become involved in this type of description,they can even believe that this is the best and most realistic position to understand these matters from,which is absolutely ridiculous,you can tell that by what they do with people,if you become sectioned they lock you up in hospital and tell you that is because they wish to keep you safe from what people outside may do to you,when you break free and understand enough about human psychology you realise that they are looking after number one as they do have erratic people who can be considered as dangerous because they do things like pour scalding water on each other,but they don't seem to come into contact with those people apart from on their ward round where they can ascertain their personal safety and only occasionally find themself caught out in the open,I had that,I'm not violent,the Dr. turned to glare threateningly in my direction.I haven't read you using the sort of language I feel like using,maybe you still do on LinkedIn,I'm not on that anymore;this can probably read as aggressive and bi-polar depending on who you are and how you interpret individual experience.
Sadly so true. And some abusive men know how to mislead psychiatrists into diagnosing their gaslit and traumatised wives with psychiatric disorders and treated with psychotropic drugs that make them compliant and easier to push around and be taken advantage of. Thank you so much for your article.
Couldn’t agree me! I recently shared with a Community Mental Health Team that I believed that they used medication as a form of “control and damage limitation”. Next thing I know, weeks later, I was called into a voluntary appointment with a Psychiatrist (which I later learn was actually a Mental Health Assessment) where I was told that there were concerns about my “delusional and bizarre belief system”. The Psychiatrist then tried to label me as schizophrenic, suggested that I might presently be psychotic and that he was considering sectioning me and forcibly medicating me?!? All because I shared a belief that challenged the framework in which he practices. And because I refused antipsychotic medication. Frightening, sickening and sadly all too common. I’m discharging myself from the service tomorrow ✌️
Yes !! THANK YOU. Thank you for shining a light on this topic. The insidiousness of this has been perpetuated for too long. It is such a transparent tactic, weaponised against victim-survivors. This has been occurring for eons, and the sooner we can acknowledge this in the greater collective, the faster it will lose its power! 🙏
For those that need to hear it - You are not alone. We believe you. 🌹🌷
Thank you so much! I am an incest survivor and domestic violence survivor who has been forcibly psychiatrized, coercively medicated, and institutionalized. I live in fear of psychiatry. In a recent mental health crisis following my mother threatening to sue me for writing about the sexual abuse in my family, my (former) best friend threatened to call 911 and have me institutionalized because I was having thoughts of self injury. I was not suicidal. And this (former) friend insists that she was within her rights to subject me to the violence of psychiatry “for my own good.” I know that psychiatry is not for my own good. Thank you for saying this.
I could have written this exact narrative myself!
That is where the term “hysterical” came from. Abused women were often institutionalize, for being hysterical. Men would abuse them for years, and then get rid of them by institutionalizing them.
Dr Karen Williams. Australian psychiatrist talks about this. Two podcasts are located here - they maybe useful to people https://icl.gov.au/exploring-understanding-coercive-control-podcast-resources/
Oh absolutely. Just as one example, undiagnosed autistic women (who are often traumatized) are frequently given a BPD or bipolar diagnosis. And these diagnoses leave women vulnerable to even MORE abuse. They’re more likely to believe that they’re the problem. The DSM is not a bible. It gets a lot wrong.
I was diagnosed with BPD even though I barely (and I stress BARELY) fit under any of the symptoms when I was in my first year of college. My college experience itself was traumatic, I was 18, alone with no support system, attending a fundamentalist Christian school. When I came to a counselor about the anxiety and depression I was really struggling with, instead of addressing the trauma responses I was having, I was sent to a psychiatrist and prescribed anti-psychotics… I should never have been prescribed them and was told that they were “mood stabilizers” and any questions I had about the side effects were carefully evaded. Needless to say that I got much worse and had to be removed from school and placed back at home because of a suicide attempt. I have not been comfortable seeing a therapist or counselor since.
I was late diagnosed autistic around Oct of 2024
I had a VERY similar college experience, including the suicide attempt at age 18 and having to be sent home. I never had a BPD diagnosis, but I had at least two therapists hint at it. I did get a bipolar diagnosis from a psychiatrist and took a mood stabilizer for 20+ years that I thought I absolutely had to take or my life would unravel. Around 6 months ago, I decided to just stop taking it. (I still take my depression and anxiety meds.) I actually feel a little better without it and my mood is completely stable. So was I ever actually bipolar? 🤷♀️Oh, and I was late diagnosed autistic in 2023. 🫠
💗❤️💗
I've nursed women who have been given this diagnosis, then later discovered they're autistic. It's why I fought so hard (It shouldn't have been a fight, but Autism still isn't recognised in women as it should be) to get my daughter a diagnosis. I was labelled as a bad mother, difficult etc etc all throughout the process of trying to get her referred for assessment.
I’m glad you fought for her. I went through that with my son and it was awful enough. My daughter is homeschooled, and I’ve not had her diagnosed. Should the need arise, I’m not fighting. I’ll only have her assessed by someone I already know will recognize it. That’s what I did for myself, well it just happened, really. I came across a husband and wife couple who worked together and who were diagnosing while also doing research specifically on how autism presents in women. The wife is a psychologist, and the husband a Doctor of Osteopathic medicine. They run an equine therapy center for autistic individuals. The wife is autistic. I knew going in that they knew what they were doing, and that I could trust them. The only person who I would even consider allowing to assess my daughter is herself autistic and has an autistic daughter. But there was no rush for my own diagnosis, and there currently isn’t for my daughter. With my son, we NEEDED that diagnosis. He was in school. He needed accommodations. He was being traumatized in school with the constant punishments for things he literally couldn’t control. And I just started where every parent does. And I went through what you did, and what SO many mothers go through if their child is a girl, or is a boy who doesn’t present exactly as these “professionals” expect. It’s absolute bullshit…so much stress, invalidation, gaslighting, the insinuations and outright accusations that it’s a parenting issue. And it’s the very parents who are already dealing with the most that are treated the worst and have to fight the hardest, when our lives are hard enough supporting our kids on our own, bucking the system, refusing to capitulate, refusing to punish what WE know are behaviors that our kids need love and support and guidance and modeling and understanding and collaboration and empathy for, not shaming and coercing and losing privileges and attacks on their autonomy that only make the behaviors worse, never better. I mean, obviously I could go on and on, lol. I applaud you and every parent of an autistic kid who has to fight for diagnosis because their kid doesn’t fit outdated criteria being applied by inept “professionals” who frankly should just find themselves another line of work as far as I’m concerned.
On a personal level I find this really reassuring and I’m going to download the resource you’ve suggested. It’s left me wondering how to access support that isn’t funnelled through a medical model. When I left an abusive relationship I was asked if I’d been to the doctor, which I didn’t do at the time. But I do need help at the moment, that much I know. Culturally there’s so much credibility attached to the medical establishment, that even though I don’t particularly know if I want to talk to a GP, my trauma almost doesn’t exist if I don’t knock on that door first.
Thank you. This is a very useful perspective. Because of the prevailing narrative I wondered if my depression and anxiety was a mental illness, but since I couldn't afford to see a mental health professional I thought there was no hope for me. Reading about the increasing numbers of people diagnosed with mental health disorders had me thinking that I must be one of the many. More recently, I have realised that I am safe and well now and can choose to move forward, leaving my past in the past and enjoying what might come next.
When my oldest daughter was 12 weeks old, I returned to work. It was a challenge - I was still breastfeeding exclusively, which meant pumping, she still woke up multiple times every night and was difficult to get to sleep at all. My husband was also new to his job and couldn’t take time off, and he wasn’t adjusting well - all the household and baby care work was falling to me. I was angry at him for not stepping up. At one point a nurse asked how I was doing and I expressed some of these challenges and was told I had postpartum depression and needed medication. I ripped that nurse a new one, and told her in no uncertain terms that ANYONE should be upset at these circumstances and that drugging me into accepting them was not going to help. It was the situation that needed to change, not me. Like you said, I felt my concerns were being completely disregarded, as if they were all in my head. She backed off pretty quickly.
Definitely my experience as an incest survivor. And I also hate that I have to "adopt" the medical model and the label at work/with HR to get my employer to accept my absences from work as valid. At my workplace the only valid reasons for absences are childcare, carer's leave or a medical issue with a medical certificate.
I don’t even know where to begin with how much this resonates- for all the ugly & sad reasons. Thank you for articulating this so well.
This is so so so important! Thank you -- deeply -- for championing these truths.
PS thank you as always for your work!
This article. Oh, how I wish I knew any of this 20 years ago. But then, who would've listened to me anyway? Unknowingly married to a narcissist, calling him out on his derelictions ultimately saw me crying out for mercy in ways he promised as I said, you and what army? Oh, never, never challenge the charming narcissist if you love your children, value your life. His army, as it turned out, live in those halls of justice we unwittingly run to for help. . Fighting for custody & subjected to those court appointed psych evals. Forced to meet a stranger with some letters behind his name because he was contracted with the state. 30 minutes later, I staggered out of his office slapped with a solid diagnosis Jung himself wouldn't dare conclude in one short, initial meeting. Oh, those magical, all powerful court psychiatrists. How did this soccer mom get there? A phone call from a woman I didn't know brought me the news that my husband had a whole other life outside of the one he shared with our kids and me. As I yelled and sobbed to him, blinded by tears and snot running into my mouth, "What have you done? What have you done? What Have You done to our babies?" He looked... bored? He looked, Impatient, Annoyed.
I slapped his face!
He had me arrested.
And just like that, I was "violent." "Hysterical," "out of control."
I needed psychiatric intervention. Meds. Bipolar! Were the kids safe with me? 20 years later... well, put it this way, you know how they couldn't put Humpty Dumpty together again? Yeah. I get it.
I can agree with you Dr.Taylor,but what can you do if you don't represent an entirety of truth,I don't know how things are globally,but the conditions that women are found in after these types of event would typically lead from police to Psychiatrist to medication in Britain,they consider this to be the correct route and the most humane,sensitive one in the face of emergency;I know that this action means that you are placed on medication which removes your capacity to tell the whole truth,they can believe they are stopping someone from committing suicide which can be their response to criticism of people involved in their profession.If you have these experiences it feels like you are removed from a life that you think you understand into an experience that leads you to believe that you no longer know what's going on,which is perceived by others as a removal from reality by people who don't understand that they would behave like this or become involved in this type of description,they can even believe that this is the best and most realistic position to understand these matters from,which is absolutely ridiculous,you can tell that by what they do with people,if you become sectioned they lock you up in hospital and tell you that is because they wish to keep you safe from what people outside may do to you,when you break free and understand enough about human psychology you realise that they are looking after number one as they do have erratic people who can be considered as dangerous because they do things like pour scalding water on each other,but they don't seem to come into contact with those people apart from on their ward round where they can ascertain their personal safety and only occasionally find themself caught out in the open,I had that,I'm not violent,the Dr. turned to glare threateningly in my direction.I haven't read you using the sort of language I feel like using,maybe you still do on LinkedIn,I'm not on that anymore;this can probably read as aggressive and bi-polar depending on who you are and how you interpret individual experience.
Sadly so true. And some abusive men know how to mislead psychiatrists into diagnosing their gaslit and traumatised wives with psychiatric disorders and treated with psychotropic drugs that make them compliant and easier to push around and be taken advantage of. Thank you so much for your article.
Couldn’t agree me! I recently shared with a Community Mental Health Team that I believed that they used medication as a form of “control and damage limitation”. Next thing I know, weeks later, I was called into a voluntary appointment with a Psychiatrist (which I later learn was actually a Mental Health Assessment) where I was told that there were concerns about my “delusional and bizarre belief system”. The Psychiatrist then tried to label me as schizophrenic, suggested that I might presently be psychotic and that he was considering sectioning me and forcibly medicating me?!? All because I shared a belief that challenged the framework in which he practices. And because I refused antipsychotic medication. Frightening, sickening and sadly all too common. I’m discharging myself from the service tomorrow ✌️
Oops! “Couldn’t agree more” 🤦🏼♀️
Yes !! THANK YOU. Thank you for shining a light on this topic. The insidiousness of this has been perpetuated for too long. It is such a transparent tactic, weaponised against victim-survivors. This has been occurring for eons, and the sooner we can acknowledge this in the greater collective, the faster it will lose its power! 🙏
For those that need to hear it - You are not alone. We believe you. 🌹🌷